Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Things not to say at your medical school interview...

I compiled a list of things “not to say at your interview" from SDN

"Your secretary is hot. Have you been tapping that?" (Sorry Ms. Cindy)
"Do you stock oxycotin in the pharmacy?"
"When do I get my key to the narcotics cabinet?""You don't drug test students do you?"
"So when I graduate I will be able to prescribe medicinal marijuana right?"
Any use of the word "y'all" (Unless in Mississippi or Alabama)
What kind of student am I? Well put it this way, I'm amazed I made it this far in school. It's not my fault. Where in the invitation letter does it say I had to wear clothes?
"What are you writing about me?"
"Do you mind if I put my feet up on the desk?"
When did you start letting women practice medicine?
"How soon in the program do we get to do gynecological exams?"
"That lunch apparently didn't agree with me -- do you mind if I crack a window?"
"Is it true that physicians are in such short supply that the worst student can still manage to get a pretty good job?"
"How little work can one do and still get by at this school?"
Interviewer: "So, what do you see yourself doing 10 years from now?"Me: (don't say doing your wife, don't say doing your wife, don't say doing your wife...)"Doing your.... son?"
"There's a reason I got an A in calculus, want me to show you how I can integrate my natural log?"
Tell me, what's your school's policy on dating patients?
"So... do we get any alone time with the cadavers?"
"Why medicine? How else will I afford a Ferrari?"
"Why medicine? I get to finger all the butts I want."
How can I explain a C average my freshman year in chemistry and an A average in Organic Chemistry? Two words, Pole....Dancing
"What would you describe as some weaknesses?" "You mean other than Kryptonite?"
Q: Why do you want to go to medical school?
A: Law school doesn't satisfy my god complex.
Q: Why do you want to be a doctor?
A: Well, being a nurse does not satisfy my ego. Plus, white goes well with my complexion.

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